Well, I am attempting to type this with Sam in my lap again, which is usually the case. It's always either that or waiting until his afternoon nap. Who knows...by the time I actually finish it might be that time anyway. Most of the time it takes me a couple hours at least to get through typing one post, with all the breaks and interruptions. I don't know what it is about the computer but every time I get on it and he is awake, no matter how involved he is in what he's doing, he gives me no peace. It's one of the things he hates me doing for some reason....unless he is on my lap and able to get into things on the desk, play with the keyboard and mouse, or play with my phone (which usually ends up in some random call to a family member or a $5.00 charge from him getting on the Internet).
So, anyway...I decided early yesterday morning to start a new trend: NO MORE BINKY! I have realized, especially lately, how Sam is way too old for his binky and way too dependant on it (actually quite obsessed, really) and the longer I keep putting it off, like I have been doing for a long time now (I have been DREADING the long nights of crying, etc.), the harder it will be. So I realized I need to take advantage of the fact that he has been happy and healthy and start now, because there's no better time. Besides, I want him to be completely rid of it by the time we go to Colorado in two weeks.
Well, I have set myself up for a miserable next few days/week (however long it will take) because of how attached to it he is, but his first day yesterday without it went surprisingly well! He went throughout the entire day not even noticing it was gone, except when it came to nap time. He cried when I put him down without it (this was the first time I have put him down without his binky EVER!) but only for like less than a minute and then went right to sleep and slept his normal nap.
During the day yesterday he only asked for it once and it was right after his nap (he likes the comfort of it when he wakes up) so I just said, "Your binky is all gone, and that's the way it's going to be for a while." When he desperately said, "binky" one more time I distracted him by saying we were going to go play at the park and he immediately cheered up and said, "park, play!"
(That was fun by the way...all he does at the park now is play with the sand so I found sand in all his crevises last night and he has sand imbedded in his scalp that I can't seem to get out)
So I was pleasantly surprised and it made me realize how much I have been to blame for his binky addiction. Not giving it to him or even mentioning it throughout the day and seeing how he didn't even barely notice made me realize that I am the one that's always giving it to him and showing it!! Out of sight, out of mind, I guess.
Then when it was time for bed time he asked for it again a couple times (it would normally be unheard of to put him to bed at night without it!) so when I took him to his room we said a prayer, I gave him a pep talk, and when I left he didn't even make a single peep!!!! He went right to sleep without a sound, which completely surprised me. However, I have noticed lately that when he has a hard time going to sleep at night it's when I turn off the hall light and he can see that it's dark under the crack of his door, so to help him out I left the hall light on until he was asleep so that he would have some comfort his first night without his binky.
Well, I didn't expect the rest of the night to go as easily, and I was right. He usually (lately) has been waking up in the middle of the night crying his head off, especially if he can't find his binky (I'm not sure if he has nightmares or gets scared, or what), so I knew it would be difficult. About 2 a.m. he woke up crying his head off as usual, so I went in and gave him a pep talk and tried to soothe, all the while his crying desperately, "binky! binky!" and put him back in bed. We listened to him cry for about 10 minutes, though it wasn't the horrible scream crying, and he finally fell asleep. Apparently he wasn't asleep enough because about five minutes later the heater in our house turned off, leaving it completely silent, and he woke up. This time, he did do the scream crying which we love so much. I let it go on for about 20 minutes and felt horrible because I know it's hard for him and he was screaming "mama, mama!" so figured I needed to go in and comfort him again. So I did (same routine as before) but this time after I went back to bed we listened to him cry his little blond head off for about another 20-30 minutes (or longer...I don't know) before he finally fell back asleep.
I felt bad for Dave too because he was getting up at 4 a.m. to go hunting with Tyrone, so I think he was a little agitated that I picked that night to be the first. I think he would have been happier with me giving in and giving it to him again so he could sleep. But I didn't and I won't. And I knew Dave would feel differently in the morning when he is awake and it's not the middle of the night. He is not ever the one to stray from something and he totally believes in follow-through. So I know when this spell is over we will both be happy we stuck with it. Besides...it's not like he was forced to get up and go hunting...
Anyway, when Sam woke up this morning (at 7 instead of 6....yay!!) he asked for it a couple more times because he likes to sit on the couch with me when he first wakes up, suck on his binky, drink his milk, and watch his shows. So I keep telling him the same thing I have been telling him: that big boys don't have binkies; only babies, and he is not a baby anymore - the binky is all gone! He doesn't like that very much but when it's not the middle of the night he handles it pretty well.
He is so cute...I finally was able to distract him by putting on his Brainy Baby show he loves, and I can hear him counting really loud (yelling, actually) with the TV in the family room. Anyway, back to the story...now that he is awake and the day has started he hasn't asked for it anymore. I think during the day it's going to be much easier than I was thinking. I just think the next few nights (HOPEFULLY not longer!!!) will be a little crazy until he forgets about it completely. And I am willing to deal with it if it means we can take that blasted thing out of our lives completely! No more always wondering where it is and trying to find an extra and making sure we have it everywhere we go (again, my fault)! I definitely know what not to do with our next baby now!
The only thing I am a little worried about is how he will be in the car on long trips (like when we drive to Prescott on Monday for my dr. appt.) for the first time without it. But he will live! Well, I am done with that for now. I will keep you all updated...as if any of you care. :) I bet that was the longest post about a binky that ever existed! :) I will be posting more posts to follow about other things!